Someone once asked me, “How can a person use a hurtful situation they’re in with another person to benefit all parties involved?”
I replied that the first thing we should do is to step back from the situation and tune in to what is going on inside of ourselves. The Bible tells us that when Rebecca sent her son Jacob away, she told him, “You can come back when you no longer feel your brother Esau’s hatred for you.”
For us, this translates to the idea of not approaching the other person until we feel that the pain and anger within has subsided. Otherwise, whatever we say or whatever we do will simply be an extension of those negative thoughts and feelings.
We may need to step away, think about what happened, and find out what was going on inside that created the situation in the first place. Then, especially if we are trying to become more spiritual, we can approach the other person directly to discuss what happened. What we shouldn’t do is go around discussing the situation with a slew of other people because chances are when we do that, we are just looking to validate ourselves and somehow put the other person down, even if that is not what we are saying outright.
The most important thing is to ask ourselves: Where is my consciousness? Am I really looking to create unity and peace? Or am I seeking to look good or to make the other person look bad? As long as we can keep these questions in the forefront of our mind, we can create a positive result.